What is Ralph’s best option to bolster relations with his sons, while he repairs relationship with former spouse: by way of using Option Solving?

Your editor’s friend Ralph from Eire opted to reach out to his former spouse’s sister, based on his recent option solving exercise. This action didn’t reveal anything untoward with former spouse, since her sister also experienced cool relations there even though they live only doors apart. Ralph therefore decided to bide his time for things to turn around and, during the meantime, to bolster relations with his two sons.  He therefore decided to move ahead with a fresh round of option solving to reveal his best near term option for bolstering those relations.

He subsequently put together a fresh question as follows: “What is Ralph’s best option to bolster relations with his sons, while he repairs relationship with former spouse; considering 1) the distances involved, 2) communication with one son is strong the other weak, 3) demonstrate continued emotional bond, and 4) need to find hook for former spouse?” It’s appropriate for Ralph to focus on just these four considerations to reduce his complexity in any eventual decision – when the ultimate decision moment arrives – despite there being many other possible considerations out there.

Ralph was then encouraged, again, to choose two appropriate yin and yang “bookends”,as these would help keep his intuitive mind focused against other mental distractions. Bookends such as these are vital for preventing our fertile intuitive minds from wandering and losing concentration. We are mostly unaware of how powerfully valuable but foot-loose our intuition can be unless we can keep it properly focused on such occasions.   

His ultimate two new bookends turned out to be: “Take a laissez faire approach” Life’s getting shorter;and “Demand phone call with former spouse” Likely to backfire. You will note the italicized detractors associated with these least likely options, which therefore put them out of consideration. Even so, these bookends will now nudge Ralph’s intuitive thinking into high gear to find more promising options – see ourLatest Worked Example.

He ultimately came up with his six most realistic options – A thru F – after additional thought. Now he was positioned to pursue emotional distancing beforehe proceeded with any outcome decision. He would then review these declared options, perhaps after 2 hours, later in the day, or first thing the following morning, before arriving at an optimal conclusion. You can replace his proposed options with any of your own.

While they all look quite relevant, Ralph was initially particularly intrigued by – Option B: Discuss what both sons want for Xmas. Ralph decided he would sleep on it until the following morning and then act accordingly. He would stick with whatever option his intuition chose to avoid unhelpful confusion.

If you have an example of your own, please share it with this blogger, through the COMMENTS area or contact him at peter@ileadershipsolutions.com .  Thanks Option Solving. (NOTE: Our next posting will be in two week’s time: “What is President Biden’s best option to turn around his approval ratings?” Let’s have your COMMENTS or go to peter@ileadershipsolutions.com to connect with the blogger. Also consider buying the book: “Smart Decisions: Goodbye Problems, Hello Options” through amazon.com)

Welcome to Option Solving (for dealing with your Decision Dilemmas) -also see latest examples below;and many more.


 See further below: “What is Ralph’s best option to bolster relations with his sons, while he repairs personal relationship? At our next blog in two weeks, we will deal  with: What is President Biden’s best option to turn around his approval ratings?”  Also, go to http://www.youtube.com and type in Option Solving and go for the 1 min 48 sec version: this will refer you to OSOLing (Option Solving On-line: a virtual way to deal with your Dilemmas)READ ABOUT THE INTERESTING, WIDE-RANGING APPLICATIONS BELOW: including the latest blog. Go to SUBSCRIBE email-to your left, if you want regular notification of blog updates.Read the book, Smart Decisions: Goodbye Problems, Hello Options. And visit the author’s main website at www.ileadershipsolutions.com

Peter Arthur-Smith, Originator of Option Solving

Peter Arthur-Smith, Originator of Option Solving

Daniel H. Pink, author of business best seller “A Whole New Mind”, with new book “Drive” says, “Peter Arthur-Smith has produced a savvy and practical book that will change how you approach the challenges in your business. By showing you the limits of ‘problem-solving’ and the power of whole-minded thinking. SMART DECISIONS will expand your strategies and widen your possibilities.”