Your editor’s friend decided on Option B: To mail a regret note. So, with tongue in cheek, that’s exactly what he did in short order. The question was: Would he get a response? With that indeterminate situation, your editor advised his friend to Peel the Onion and consider his sub-options.
His friend then contemplated his sub-options by posing the following interrelated question: “Peel the Onion: What could be a friend’s optimum way to neutralize a broken family friendship – Option B- Mail a regret note for an early lunch to reconcile; considering 1) been family friends for a number of years, 2) a desire to advise and help backfired, 3) shouted my friend out of his family friend’s life, and 4) offended friend’s personality unlikely open to permit reconcile-iation?” Again, it’s appropriate to focus on just these four considerations to reduce complexity in his eventual decision, when that ultimate moment arrives – despite there being many other possible considerations out there.
His friend agreed to sustain the same fitting yin and yang “bookends,”as these help to keep people’s minds focused against other immediate mental distractions. Bookends such as these are vital for preventing our fertile intuitive minds from wandering and losing concentration. We are mostly unaware of how powerfully valuable but foot-loose our intuition can be unless we can keep it properly focused on such occasions.
Those “bookends” turned out to be: “Just wait for time to heal the emotional wound” – Haven’t got years to wait;and “Buy a very expensive gift as recompense” – Doesn’t have funds to meet the possibility. You will note the italicized detractors associated with these least likely options, which shows why they are not a particularly good idea for consideration. Even so, these same bookends will now hopefully nudge his intuitive thinking once more into high gear and come-up with a range of realistic options – see ourLatest Worked Sub-Option Example.
His friend now set-about coming up with at least five plus realistic sub-options – AA thru FF – that would then be ready for some emotional distancing, Emotional distancing would allow him to take a couple of hours or more of quiet reflection, or even sleep on it, beforecoming to any final conclusion/decision. You can replace these proposed options with any new ones of your own.
While these six sub-options looked especially interesting, his friend was particularly intrigued by – Sub-Option CC: No response – ask his wife to reach out to husband-relative. He did then pursue emotional distancing again with your editor’s advice that, once he revisited his sub-options, he should stick with whatever choice his intuitive mind arrived at. It would only likely work against him to second-guess himself once his initial decision was been made…no matter the challenges ahead.
If you have an example of your own, please share it with this blogger, through the COMMENTS area or contact him at peter@ileadershipsolutions.com . Thanks Option Solving. (NOTE: Our next posting will be in two week’s time: “What is Ukraine’s best option right now?” Let’s have your COMMENTS or go to peter@ileadershipsolutions.com . Allow time to connect with the blogger. Also consider buying the book: “Smart Decisions: Goodbye Problems, Hello Options” through amazon.com)
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