Making the Most of My New Year’s Resolution: by means of Option Solving!

Posted on January 15, 2011 by Peter Arthur-Smith

Two weeks ago a lot of people were either in the process of making or had already made a New Year’s Resolution. It is well known that few New Year’s Resolutions neither make it very far nor, even if they do, are not acted upon especially diligently. Maybe you’ve already abandoned yours; maybe you’re at the half-hearted stage.

One of the reasons for such paucity in success is because people are really not emotionally committed to their intentions. This is where option solving comes in because, if the technique is used properly, users are emotionally committed to its choices. By tapping into ones intuitive mind, we are more likely to connect with the emotional side of our decision making and therefore our level of commitment increases.

To this end, anyone making a New Year’s Resolution could start out with a question along the lines: “What is my optimal resolution for this year, considering the economic environment is still rather tight, my family’s needs, my own need to move forward, and my need to accomplish something really valuable?” (Note the considerations in the second part of the question.)

 

With this question in place, it is now possible to anchor it with the more extreme options (otherwise known as ‘bookends’). These could include: “Not pursuing a resolution this year” at one end and “Make a great breakthrough this year.”

 

From here, we can now insert at least 5-6 New Year Resolution choices in between, in order to stretch the choices as much as possible. Sleep on them overnight: this is particularly important to increase the level of commitment. Such natural emotional distancing enables our intuitive mind to really explore all the issues and challenges associated with the different options. By the following morning, it will be settled on the option we have the best chance of keeping. And so our resolution becomes more of a reality instead of a maybe. Come to think of it, now I can make my own resolution.    

Please refer to the Latest Example to view the overall picture of a recent solution. If you have an example of your own, please share it with this blogger, through the COMMENTS area. 

Thanks Option Solving. (NOTE: Next posting in 2 weeks: “Using Option Solving to decide on ‘Forming the right collaborative relationship with another group or department?’”  You’re your COMMENTS or go to peter @ileadershipsolutions.com to connect with the blogger.)

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New Year’s Personal Resolution/Focus and Option Solving

Posted on December 31, 2009 by Peter Arthur-Smith

Going back to December 24th’s posting, we will probably have our professional/career priority or focus set for 2010 by now. This allows us the time to focus on our personal resolutions for the New Year. Of course there are those who would argue for doing it the other way around and that will be fine, too. Although there are some lucky folks who have an inner compass that keeps their lives on track over the course of a year, most other folks will do much better by clarifying their personal focus by early 2010.

With the use of Option Solving, your first step is to define the right question. Take the example of a widower friend: his wife died when their kids were still teenagers. His question could be, “What focus will give my personal life a real boost in 2010, so that I can feel centered, have consistent companionship and enrich my life in other ways?”

Getting this question right is an important beginning but establishing the right, contrary bookends are just as important: for example, 1) Keep paddling away with current unclear relationships, and, at the other end, 2)Take off for Europe and return with a new bride. As a European who has lived in the US for many years, with two grown American offspring, the latter would not be totally off the wall but highly unlikely.

Bookends spur the more creative juices to start working as the intuitive mind starts searching for other more appropriate options between these two unlikely, diverse alternatives (see Chapters 5 & 6 in the book). Potential options for him would include: A)?, or B) Join a quality dating house, or C) Immerse myself in my seafaring hobby, or D)?, or E) Revisit all recent happier relationships and rekindle the right ones.

What he chooses is not important to dwell on, since only he can determine his intuitive, rather than rational, choices as he sees them. But, after an appropriate degree of “emotional distancing’ (see book), he can benefit from at least 5 alternatives for his intuitive senses to assess and choose his best possibility. Either within a few hours break or an overnight recess, he would come out with a clear choice. He will then be committed to that choice because he will have considered all other reasonable choices: this is a major benefit from option solving…rather than continuing to second guess himself. (Note: The next posting about my other student-daughter’s option solving exercise, to determine how to deal with a new part-time hookah bar job, will be within 7 days.)

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  • Six Principles of Option Solving

    1. Ask the right contextual question and frame the possibilities through bookends
    2. Be imaginitive and think "Out of the Box"
    3. Avoid asking "how, why, when or where" until the best option is identified
    4. Avoid excluding any option until all options have emerged
    5. Allow participants to support a less than conclusiv option
    6. Accept hunches or gut feelings